Give up?

As the sun sets in, I wonder if I would be now looking out the window of my new office at the 25th floor in a building in Buendia, Makati if my mother were here.

Honestly, it still haunts me that I didn’t follow her ardent wish that I stay with PDI. I’ve always wanted to change companies but didn’t realize that it would also mean changing jobs. Learning is never an easy thing to me. I always stumble, make a fool of myself, and appear to be clueless of the new job. But in the end, I always triumph. I know this pattern by heart because I’ve been through this many times.

I am not doubting my ability to learn but I don’t know how much of myself will I lose if I keep hanging on. I’m beginning to enjoy the job but the few people who live and thrive with sarcasm are too much for the rest of us here.

I asked myself if I should give up because of the two people who just cannot live without insulting anyone every single day. I am lucky because they haven’t touched me in any way but the pessimism hangs in the air like molecules.

I am tempted to fight back because I know I can, and I know people are behind me or if I don’t do it who else will?

There is no nirvana, I know that. But should people bear the draconian rule imposed by someone who is not even the “boss”?

I initially wanted to become part of the solution but the rate things are going, people here have given up. Should I?